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A Pair of Nuts on the Throne

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Ahh, the Old Kingdom!

Come and admire our angry dragons up close. Take a dip with mighty sea serpents in our warm seas. Play catch-the-arrow with merry elven warriors. Drink beer* with the dwarves.

For an unforgettable experience, the Old Kingdom is the ideal destination for your next holiday**

Survival is optional, and highly unlikely.

*Similarity to actual beer not guaranteed.

**Travel insurance not available.

***This is what three asterisks look like when you put them in a row.

A Pair of Nuts on the Throne is book three in the Robot vs Dragons series. To maximise your enjoyment, this description is completely devoid of spoilers, or indeed, useful information of any kind.****

****Trust me, if you've read the first two books you know what you're getting, and if you haven't you're on the wrong product page.

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The Robot vs Dragons series of fantasy comedy novels by Simon Haynes

Those dark, gritty, fantasy series would be much better with a large dollop of humour. Here's the dollop!

1. A Portion of Dragon and Chips (Out Now!)

2. A Butt of Heads (Sept 2018)

3. A Pair of Nuts on the Throne (Oct 2018)

FAQ (Updated June 2018)

Where did you get the idea for this madness?
April 2018. April 1st, to be exact. I put together a joke cover for the book and announced it on social media. Within three hours I realised I was going to have to to write it.

Can't you just write more Hal Spacejock?
I will, after this one. Hal Spacejock 9: Max Damage is already planned. In fact, I have Hal Spacejock novels planned all the way up to #22, but that's too scary to contemplate.

Will Hal Spacejock and Clunk appear in this novel?
Are you kidding? Clunk is the STAR of this novel! As for Hal ... who knows?

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